Happiness

Your hand in mine, cuddled together, softly at your side

The hands on the clock tick, that’s time ing by

My whole life I’ve longed for that kind of sappiness

But my body shakes and rejects that feeble happiness

Like a hole that’s dug out into the sky

It’s a void that lingers in my mind

It impresses heavily and I can’t leave it behind

But are those thoughts even mine?

A scratch on my arm is leaking more and more with every day

But no medicine can make the infected wound go away

It’s an ugly mark on the skin I’m scared to call mine

And it pulses and hurts in the middle of the night

Please only give me a love that’s stained in blood

I hold my breath, “enough” will never be enough

I slow my heart, everything I know is twisted up

Shaking, breaking, I might crumble into dust

Put a bandage over the things that I’ve felt

Close the door and try to look away from hell

Heaven ain’t close in a place like this

Dusty visions settle on my eyelids

Those early days could never last forever

Always felt like things couldn’t be better

But it all breaks eventually, now my heart forbids

The slightest sensation of a modest happiness

There’s so many cuts on my skin and they always bleed

I can’t recover from the horrors that I’ve seen

Always on edge with a twisted vision in my head

No one takes, I guess damaged goods aren’t in yet

Leave me a kiss on my busted bleeding lips

I need a break from longing for happiness

If I can accept the way things are

Maybe the cuts will fade from my heart

(Image not mine)