De Facto: Part XVIII.

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“It started with me,” Ruby whispered. “And a group of off-colors, and — and a human named Lars.”

There was no sound. No warmth.

At Ruby’s words, Zircon’s mouth opened, but no sounds came out. Inadvertently her hand hovered over her gem. She couldn’t believe what she had heard — she had to toss it around her mind a couple times, shake her head, try to block out everything around her because — what in stars?! It wasn’t as quiet as she’d first thought; far off she could hear a peridot talking rather loudly, the nasally tones echoing on the walls. She wanted to tell her to shut up.

Finally she echoed, “The Lars?”

“The what now?” Yellow interjected. Zircon whirled to her, appalled.

“Are you serious — Yellow, you bubbled its head! It came with Rose Quartz; are you telling me you never wondered what happened to it — ?”

“What happened to HIM,” Raspberry cut in. “The humans have more than one gender. And they generally don’t like being called ‘it’. When you refer to Lars, you use the pronouns ‘he, him, and his’.”

It took a good several seconds for either zircon to understand what Raspberry meant. They looked at each other, then to Cranberry, who was nodding. “I’ve...never heard of those,” said Zircon politely, “but thank you. Correct me if I forget.”

“That’s not a thing,” Yellow Zircon respond. “I call schist.”

Raspberry sniffed. “Deal with it, Banana Boat.”

Yellow stared, then opened a screen from her monocle. “Libra, define ‘banana boat’.”

Zircon leaned over and suggested, “Look up ‘gender’ next. Anyway. That’s...not important right now. The Lars is a ‘he’. And he — Ruby. You know he?”

“Him,” Raspberry corrected. Cranberry put her hand on Raspberry’s arm.

“Grammar lessons can wait, love.”

“We — we all do,” said Ruby. She still had her knitting needles and was beginning to knit a little pattern into the scarf, making little swirls and braids in the fabric. “He s — sh — s — saved us.”

“You saved us,” said Raspberry, her voice now soft. Ruby just shrugged.

Cranberry noticed the confusion on both zircons’ faces and nodded. “About five hundred years ago, Raspberry arrested Cherry for selling without a license. But before we could decide what to do with her, she took off her blindfold, looked at me and Raspberry, and said, ‘If you shatter me, you will never see the quartz again’.”

The silence was so thick that it felt like it encased them, freezing each of them in place. Then Ruby untangled a knot, made a satisfied little “Ah!” and began clicking her knitting needles again.

“I thought it was a threat,” said Raspberry Quartz.

“And rightly so,” murmured Cranberry.

“But Cran wanted to hear her out. So we did. She...she knew that me and Cran had been fusing, even though we hadn’t told anyone. She told us that nobody else knew yet, but that the next time we fused, one of my quartzes would see us and report it. I’d be shards before the suns rose.”

Cranberry picked up the story. “So I did the research and found out about Cherry’s future vision. As shallow as it sounds, Raspberry and I decided that it could be used to our advantage, so we submitted a false report saying that she was being detained at our facility for minor infractions. Every time we wanted to fuse, we would ask her, and she would tell us the possible ways that we could get caught.”

“But she kinda grew on us.” A ghost of a smile flickered across Raspberry’s usual scowl. As if sensing the smile, Ruby turned around in Raspberry’s lap and reached up.

“Hug?” Ruby asked. Sighing, Raspberry gave it. After a second, Cranberry leaned in and Raspberry put her arm around her, too.

“About a month ago,” Cranberry said, “Cherry had a vision that we couldn’t prevent. She said — no matter what, we were going to be found out. Our options were being shattered or fleeing Homeworld for good.”

“That was when we found you,” said Raspberry, “and Ruby found Lars’ gems.”

As Ruby wriggled out of the hug, Cranberry found her little hand and squeezed it. “We told her not to, but Cherry often left the facility to sell her cloaks to underworld gems. Then one day, she came back and told us, ‘You aren’t alone.” She said she foresaw a disturbance in Sector One, so she followed it. To an abandoned kindergarten.”

“Th — there — the gems were there,” said Ruby. “Off-colors like us. A — another fusion, Rhodonite. And another, F, Fluorite. A sapphire. And con — coned twins. Rutile.”

“Cherry likes Rutile. A lot,” Raspberry Quartz grinned.

Ruby fumbled with her needles. “N — no I don’t!”

Cranberry Tourmaline pretended that no interruption had occurred. She laced her fingers together in her lap. “Starlite,” she said softly, meeting Zircon’s eyes, “Cherry found Lars at the same time that Raspberry found you. Both you and Lars came to my facility in the same rotation, you arriving first by about an hour. After you left, I asked Lars for help, and he said he could give it, and explained. About you and Rose Quartz.

Zircon’s gut tightened at the name. “Was — was she with Lars?”

“No. Fortunately. She escaped Homeworld and returned to Earth...Lars offered to send us in the same way, but it was...strange. I don’t know how to explain it. It’s such a long story. But we decided to wait, and hide here, and gather other gems. You, if we could. When we last ed Lars, he said...Rose is worried for you.”

Oh, stars. Zircon looked at her hands, suddenly feeling alone. As if a burden she had carried for miles was lifted off her back. And to think that she had carried it so long when she had missed relief by an hour…

“Why didn’t you tell me?” asked Zircon, her voice pathetically small. “I didn’t care WHO had Rose Quartz; all I wanted was to find her! I would’ve gone with you! Hah — do you understand what the Diamonds put me through?”

Her voice shot up. She’d even slipped into an old habit, gesticulating wildly with her arms. She accidentally hit Yellow’s leg, but suddenly, she was too angry to care.

“Blue Diamond ordered me to spy on Yellow Diamond, right under her nose! And do you know who just achieved the record for ‘Most Times Poofed By Yellow Diamond In One Month’? Yes, ME! I have had at least THREE separate mental breakdowns in the past several rotations and what you tell me is that they were PREVENTABLE?!”

“Excuse you,” Raspberry snapped.

Zircon locked eyes with her. “Excuse ME?”

“Yes, excuse you,” she replied. “Don’t you dare talk to Cranberry like that. She risked her gem for you once, and this is how you — ”

She stopped when Cranberry put her hand on her arm. “Let her speak,” was all Cranberry said. But suddenly, Zircon lost the nerve. Cranberry was looking at the heat lamp in the center of the circle, her face worn. Almost sad.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Zircon echoed.

Cranberry sighed. She was fiddling with her silver bracelets again, pushing them around and around her wrists. She closed her eyes.

“I was a coward. I knew you were still loyal to Blue Diamond, and I know what she thinks of inter-type fusion. Cherry foresaw one future where you would tell Blue Diamond about the Off-Colors, and...terrible things happened. It wouldn’t matter that Blue Diamond wanted you. If she knew about me and Raspberry, or the rhodonite fusion, or Fluorite...it would be over for us. So I let you go. I’m sorry.”

The bracelets kept spinning. Zircon wanted to be angry with Cranberry Tourmaline, and she knew she would be justified — but she couldn’t make herself believe it. If Zircon had the right to be angry, Cranberry had the right to be scared. Blue Diamond wasn’t merciful. She was fickle, manipulative, unpredictable. In a universe where the trial of Rose Quartz had never happened, Zircon might have been the public defender who watched Cranberry and Raspberry be dragged away for shattering.

“You did what you had to,” Zircon finally said, her voice tight in her throat. “I shouldn’t have reacted the way I did. The important thing now is that Rose Quartz is safe, and so are we.”

“Not nec — ne — necessarily,” murmured Ruby.

“I don’t mean to intrude...or disrespect,” said Yellow Zircon, “but the ruby is very depressing.”

“But she’s right,” said Raspberry. “Zircon, every patrol in Homeworld swarmed down here for you. Whether or not we’re safe depends entirely on what the stars you did up there.”

Escaping the trial. It seemed so long ago, and yet it had only happened less than a rotation prior. Suddenly weary, Zircon slumped back against the wall — she really didn’t like being constantly reminded that she was a fugitive.

“Like I said,” she sighed, “Blue Diamond assigned me to spy on Yellow Diamond for information. When I was caught and put on trial, Yellow helped me escape. It wasn’t very subtle, which explains the search patrols.”

“Not my fault,” Yellow put in.

“I wasn’t saying it was.”

“It was implied.”

“Or so you assume. Anyway, yes, I get it. All of Homeworld wants me ground up until you could blow me away with an industrial fan. All I want is to pretend, for a second, that things are looking up. Is that really so much to ask?”

Yellow Zircon snorted. Cranberry and Raspberry exchanged glances and seemed to communicate silently again before Raspberry rolled her eyes and Cranberry nodded.

“Alright. You can rest,” said Cranberry. “I’m sure the other gems will be curious, so we’ll let them know not to bother you two until you’re ready. It really has been such a long day…”

A few more things were said but Zircon automatically tuned them out, now unable to forget the concept of rest. It was suddenly very noticeable how much her feet hurt, how grimy her hands were, how rumpled her pants had gotten. Not soon enough, Raspberry and Cranberry stood to leave, Ruby floating between them. “We’ll leave you alone for one rotation,” said Raspberry, “but since nobody can tell time down here, we’ll come back whenever we want.”

“Sure,” said Yellow Zircon. Once the three were out of sight, she leaned over and whispered to Zircon, “I don’t like them.”

“You haven’t exactly made the best impression on them,” Zircon remarked.

“I’m willing to bet that you haven’t either.”

She sighed. “No.” Uncomfortable as she sat on the stone floor, Zircon pushed the heat lamp away and slowly shifted until she was lying on her side, resting her head on her arm. She wasn’t sure why she always lay down when tired. She got nothing out of it except a sore arm later. But it felt natural — like someday, she would lie down and something wonderful would happen, draining her exhaustion and filling her with energy for the first time since she crawled out of her Kindergarten. “But I think…they trust me. I don’t know why. And Rose Quartz was WORRIED for me.”

Yellow followed her lead, laying down on the ground next to Zircon. Between them, the only sounds were echoes in the background, voices of rebels and runaways. Hushed. Insistent. Hesitantly, Yellow reached out and fingered the hem of Blue Zircon’s cravat.

“It’s softer,” she said.

“I wasn’t thinking about it,” Zircon replied.

Yellow shrugged the best she could while lying on her side. It was then that Zircon noticed the new pattern on Yellow’s jacket — the bottom had lost its notch and the fastenings ran all the way down to the hem. The dark yellow stripe led straight up now, draping over her shoulders. Just like the new pattern on Blue Zircon’s vest.

“Could you have possibly gotten more ‘frack the Diamonds; I’m a rebel now’ with that outfit?” Blue remarked dryly. Yellow just groaned.

“If we’re going to make a habit out of mocking things I said to mock you,” said Yellow, “at least give me warning. That hurt.”

It was Blue’s turn to reach out and trail her fingers up Yellow’s jacket, brushing the cravat. “Was it on purpose?”

“I wasn’t thinking about it either.” Her face was flushed a deep ochre.

As if to escape the conversation, Yellow moved onto her back, tucking her arms behind her head, so Blue didn’t pursue it. And so they lay under the concrete sky, imagining the stars beyond. Then Yellow sighed.

“You’re brave,” she said. “And I’m obedient. That’s why they like you.”

When Blue looked over, Yellow had taken off her monocle and was running her fingers down the edges. She put it back and pulled up a oval screen that floated above them, awaiting a command. But neither of them gave one and Yellow waved it away.

“Rest,” Yellow barely whispered.

Weary, Blue closed her eyes. “Rest.”

Her lips formed the word, but no sound came out.

-

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