Green :green_heart: :recycle: :sparkle: :eight_spoked_asterisk: :white_check_mark: :negative_squared_cross_mark: :u6307: :chart:
Dear Dearest,
Like a needle in a hay stack. You keep your emotions in check. Whenever I please you, you look away, hiding your small smile. But we both know it’s there.
I try to get you to crack. I have dates with others where I know you’ll be. You always leave.
I’m so sorry.
Am I not that important? I had always asked.
I confront you why you won’t ask me out. You ram away covering your face. Your not worth it I told myself. But I know it’s a lie.
I’m so sorry.
One day your mom invited me to babysit your baby sister. You weren’t there. I put Sasha for a nap and explore.
I try to find your room. It wasn’t hard. Your parents were divorced I knew from Instagram.
There were 4 rooms. One with the name Sasha painted on it, and one with Mommy, one bathroom, yours and... one labeled Marie.
I’m so sorry.
I walked into your room. It was clean. Like doctors clean.
I had looked around. There were pictures of you and a girl that looked EXACTLY like you.
I felt like puking. I looked almost exactly like that girl.
The pictures were dated 2016, 2014,2015. The highest was 2016. I ran out and into The Marie’s room.
I’m so sorry.
Not clean. Dirty. Dresses thrown everywhere. Swimming suits were thrown out. A meddle hung above the sorrowful dresser. It had said swimming champ.
She had drown...
And I made it even harder. I had sunk to the floor. The baby screamed. I didn’t even hear.
After I took care of the baby I sat down and started this letter.
The holes everywhere on the page our my tears of conscious.
I’m soooooooooooooooooooo sorry.
And I know sorry doesn’t mean anything. Not now. I thought you should know I’m graduating early and will be moving. You’ll never have to see me and be reminded about your sister, Marie.
I love you... and that’s why I’m leaving.
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