♡; a(n un)helpful guide to seventeen

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“hello my name is Mingyu, today is my birthday, I love my Carat, do you know it?”

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Why hello hello my dear cinnamon rolls. I see you’ve either clicked this page in either interest, help (lol) or for comedy/seeing more of a group you already stan if you happen to be a Carat already yourself. Of course, me being the hard core Seventeen trash that I am, I also love my fellow Carats and soon-to-be Carats, therefore I hope you can enjoy and take valuable information from this very VERY useful blog.

let’s slip right on into the diamond life shall we?

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Memeteen

Memeteen are not in fact a 17 member group, so let’s not think that now, but a 13 member group. They’re under Ple(ase treat your idols better)dis Entertainment and debuted on May 26, 2015 with their song Adore U (not you but u cause they’re unique and cool).

fandom name - carrot🥕

fandom colors - rose quartz and serenity (although there’s no ounce of serenity in their body)

(pink and blue to be simple)

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Let’s meet our memes

Please know that SVT is full of very serious people. They come from upclass CEO families and always eat with a silver spoon, they’re very sophisticated and use honorifics even with newborn children. For Christmas they wrap presents with brown paper bags because red is deemed too colorful/cheerful and they have absolutely no sense of humor. They’re very very serious people.

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Choi Seungcheol

S.Coups (not scoops but S, Coups.)

Coups, spelled c, o, u, p. Coups.

Father of seventeen

Will probably kill you with his bars

Keep him away from fireworks, he’ll have a heart attack

Kisses all the

Hugs all the

Loves all the

Cuddles.

Is an actual bean but will own you in a second

Also has amazing and sweet vocals lowkey that we deserve to hear more of

Very caring and loving

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Yoon Jeonghan

Jeonghan

Is prettier than you and everyone you love

Had long hair that slayed everyone and their mama

Is sassy and is probably lowkey judging you

Questions his group sometimes

Also beautiful vocals that he’s been insecure about and shouldn’t be

Mommy of seventeen

Takes care of the like they’re his angels/babies, cause they are

“Dino Nugu aegi?”

Warns you about falling into the water because he won’t save you if you do

makes giraffes quake

Angel 1004

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Joshua Hong/Hong Jisoo

Joshua

Jisoos Christ

“Sunday morning rain is falling”

Won’t give just anyone a blessing

“drink water, not alcohol”

You may think he’s normal, but he’s really not

Will correct your English even if he’s sleeping. He’s done it.

Has a voice like honey

Sang in his church’s choir cause he’s just that holy

From LA and was street casted at a festival cause that’s how Hong Jisoo do

Will sing you a love song about how much he loves chocolate and all different kinds of chocolate. He’s done that too.

Learned guitar from YouTube, something I could never do

“Chicken will heal our hearts.”

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Wen Junhui

Jun

Sometimes a visual, sometimes a meme

China line, dont sleep on him

Beautiful piano player

Dances like an angel

Sings like the cherubs

Is done with everyone’s shit

Positive he doesn’t have a hip bone

Is also very adorable and we don’t deserve him

Cute shyness level 100

Honestly have nothing weird to say about Jun, he’s too precious.

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Kwon Soonyoung

Hoshi

a hamster

Will kill for SHINee

Choreographs for seventeen

Will dispose of the body for SHINee

Very very cute and very very derp

Will clean the evidence for SHINee

Looks soft but his vocals and rap can actually kill

Moves like water

Has a secret friend named John

naega hosh

Likes to overreact and will probably spoil everything

Calls us his princesses and he’s our prince (too sweet)

If he has a stuffed animal, I’m 100% sure he’ll copy the face it’s making

10 hour 10 minute

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Jeon Wonwoo

Wonwoo

lil emo but we love him please appreciate him and understand him

Deep voice, killer bars

Beanies

Hello darkness my old friend

Audrey Hepburn

Bad case of resting bitch face but is actually a soft piece of cabbage

Circle glasses for days

His life is hamburger

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Lee Jihoon

Woozi

Wants to be tough but is far too soft and adorable

Hates aegyo but he’s the member we all want it from

Will probably stab someone if they hug him, unless it’s a Carat

Also has soft and high vocals

Is very talented and writes/produces the songs for Seventeen (along with help from and Bumzu etc)

claim he bullies them (as a joke)

Will beat you with a guitar

An elf. A short elf. You’ll see plenty of short jokes about him.

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Lee Seokmin

DK/Dokyeom he’s indecisive

embarrassing? never heard of her

actual clown

flower

High pitched rapping

Is the main energy source of seventeen

His vocals can go higher than your grades

Has a face structure only Jesus (Jisoos) can produce

It’s not 20 it’s twoteen

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Kim Mingyu

Mingyu

the step mom of seventeen (my words)

Cooks for everyone, all of them, all 12 filled with mommy Mingyu’s love feast

Can cook many packs of ramen perfectly in little time, practice makes perfect

Sometimes I get why he’s the visual, sometimes I don’t

Lowkey vocal god

loves guys

Looks like he can be cold but is actually one of the softest people you’ll ever know

SVT energy skin care

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Xu Minghao

The8

lil Thughao

Dances like a queen

Also has very adorable vocals

Is either cute/squishy or will kill you with visuals, no in between

Kermit is his savior

B boying for days

Also China line, please stan and appreciate

Will decapitate you with nunchucks

Actually invented dabbing, he won’t stop

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Boo Seungkwan

Seungkwan

roses are red,

violets are blue,

boo Seungkwan boo,

is sassier than you.

- a poem by me

iS tHE beSt QUaLitY

Likes to be the female when doing duets with DK

Kimbap kidding??

Has a little too much energy

Will sing anywhere and everywhere

Can over dramatize any situation, I bet money

A voice from the heavens

great dramatic scene actor (JASMINEEE)

Divaboo

Will rap faster than my grades fall, which is pretty damn fast

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Hansol Vernon Choi/Choi Hansol

Vernon

“I’m from New York but I moved to Korea when I was 5”

Fortune cookie hair

Memesol

Not aware of his surroundings and will probably dance into the middle of the highway if you don’t take out his earbuds

Laughs very loudly at everything

He may not be the best rapper but she loves his rap

Very loud, honestly won’t stfu when performing

his fans are his girlfriends

His eyebrows are more put together than my life

You know when that hotline bling, that can only mean one thing

Please let his mother know that he won this

Won’t let his little sister date anyone until she’s 32

that kidney function isn’t a right, it’s a privilege

“Hello I’m Hansol, do you know what a halfer is?” Yes this poor child really said that

Was on Show Me The Money but we don’t talk about it please don’t bring it up

*but everyone brings it up* headlines headlines

“Sofia you’re not supposed to say ‘oh my God’”

5 mins later: “oH My GoD”

s his ship with Seungkwan

Bubbles.

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Lee Chan

Dino

Jeonghan’s baby

It’s Dino, not die no.

Duck hair

Maknae on top

Has a deadly pelvis

Michael Jackson is his actual hero

Dances girl group choreo better than gfriend

Dances everything better than everyone really

Grew up too quickly

Is actually harassed by the

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I Hope This Meme Guide Was Helpful

I hope you’re able to spread your diamond wings with this useful knowledge my dear baby Carats

Bye Bye~~~

#memeteen

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paw print; 11.30.17 @ 10:12pm est