I SHIFTED TO MCU PART 1 : THE BATTLE AGAINST THANOS

Welcome again, mortals and immortals..

THE DAY FINALLY CAMEEE. I knew I’d make this post after my first shift to the MCU in May. If you haven’t checked my first post on this series, I highly suggest it because it covers the basics of this desired reality. I came back on 2/11/2022 and have been noting down all my experiences.   The majority of the time I’ve spent after my shift was mainly to try and calm myself down because it was quite A LOT. I will try my best to compose myself and write this post as best as I can. So I can share all my experiences in a more, neat format. With that being said, let’s begin. This will include a few parts because I doubt I’ll be able to fit everything into one post. If you want me to cover anything specific, be it an experience or a memory I had there, feel free to comment.

A reminder that I did not script anything about this reality! I’ve spent roughly around 9 - 11 months there, basically less than a year. My early discoveries of my powers in my DR were empathy, which meant I was able to pick up on people’s emotions and lingering past emotions and translate them into sensory details. (Sometimes even pictures) I will be telling my experiences during the first battle against Thanos and what it was like being around the avengers. I’ll be getting into my settled life with Wanda in my next part!

Days leading to the shift, I having dreams about Wanda. She was popping up ALOT and bombarded me with signs. (Like okay yes, you have my full attention mam 🤭) I seeing her look very upset in my dreams, but I couldn’t the context of which. On the night of the shift, I couldn’t this very clearly but I knew I listened to two of my subliminals,shift on command subliminal and another unreleased one that I’ve been working on for weeks. I also listened to Kira Domain’s sleep paralysis subliminal and went to sleep. I do this thing where I wake up 3-4 hours later and try to stay up for at least 15 minutes before going back to sleep. I don’t recall the symptoms or anything that was of significance. All I ed was going to sleep thinking about Wanda, imagining how the room feels and how it feels to be nestled into her. In a way, I utilized my senses and anchored myself to my DR.

This was taken from my memory while I shifted there. Listen, being blipped feels weird, it feels almost disorientating and nauseating. At least, this was how I felt. It’s hard to put this down into words but it feels like I blink and just completely enter this...nothingness. I don’t feel anything, I don’t think of anything for those split moments. It’s like I simply cease to exist which for the record wasn’t far from the truth. The build-up was painful, not physically but emotionally. I had just witnessed Vision’s death, Pietro’s death, and Wanda who was clinging on to me so hard, begging me not to go. I tried grounding myself but I couldn’t even finish what I was saying before I just disintegrated. Nothing feels like absolutely nothing. Feels like I shut my eyes, my head empty, with no thoughts, feelings, or sensations. The build-up of the blip feels like there’s something rotating inside my body before it spreads, almost? And then it just happens and I have absolutely no control over it. The worst part wasn’t the fact that I got blipped, but the fact that I left Wanda for 5 years alone. When she had lost all three of her loved ones in the span of a few hours. I couldn’t begin to imagine how hard it was to go through something so tragic and drastic.

This was my personal experience working alongside the avengers and just generally being around them. I am not closely acquainted with most of them and only consider a few as my friends. A few of them are—Wanda, Pietro, Vision, Natasha, Peter Parker, T'Challa, Steve, and Bruce. I didn’t converse with the rest of the avengers often and say that we’re more like working acquaintances. Because don’t get me wrong, everyone was willing to protect one another 100%. We also had a collective mission and we shared the same desire to achieve said goal. Once the battle with Thanos came to an end, everyone just went their own way—which was a natural thing because we all have a personal life and a family to turn to. It felt like it was just done. No communication and simply just walking our own individual paths, forgoing everything that has already happened. Our lives were not interlaced with one another anymore and we didn’t share a collective purpose because it was already done. So yes, the avengers disbanded and everyone went their own ways.

I did want to add that I enjoyed the time I had with everyone. They were welcoming, and ive, and never failed to give me the extra boost of uplift when I needed it. We had celebrations or gatherings here and there—sometimes even game nights with some of the . We were still prone to arguments because there were quite a few that took place. Disagreements that led to arguments that felt like they had to be resolved for the sake of prolonging it further. It felt like a working environment for me sometimes. But aside from that, something I found interesting was that I could NOT be around them a lot at the start. This was before I learned how to set a boundary for my powers. Because whenever I was around them, I became an actual sponge absorbing everyone’s emotions, even past emotions that linger around them :sob: And you know the thing about avengers being a bunch of adult orphans who experienced some form of trauma, well yeah. I was able to feel their anger, grief, and regret—and because of how inexperienced I was with my empathy abilities, I quickly became overwhelmed. Which was why I had a hiding spot in the Avengers compound which I’d run to whenever things got too difficult for me to handle.

Though I’ll have to say that a few of my favorite moments were training alongside Natasha and Steve, having game nights that turn into chaos real quick, or hosting little parties where we would pop champagne bottles. We also did some sort of field trip too, mainly for training purposes but it was also one of the highlights for me. Working with the avengers taught me a lot about looking out for one another, coordination, unity, and teamwork. I did feel ed and heard. I was never shunned or belittled but was continuously ed. My confidence got a lot better as well which was something I noticed. I felt safe around them and having people who have gone through similar things as i did didn’t make me feel so alone.

CW: mentions of death, k*llings, cussing.

Before I begin, some things took place in my DR which are completely different from the MCU you know here. Pietro did not during Ultron's invasion however, the first battle marked the day my loved ones have ed. I have taken the time to grieve in my DR as well as here, but if I’m being honest, it is still heavy on me.

The first battle against Thanos was acute madness. From what I ed it was just a never-ending struggle and constant worry that never left us. Before the fight in Wakanda, all four of us (Vision, Pietro, Wanda, and I) were in Denmark. Because of Vision’s mind stone which is embedded into his head, we were targeted. And god do I this where we were ambushed.

Our main priority was to protect Vision which put me in charge of finding a safe exit out while the maximoff twins stalled them. (Didn’t know what the attacker’s names were, but they were part of the black order) I was sweating on the spot because avoiding them was not a walk in the park. I tried to find a safer spot but it was like they knew where I was headed to and kept coming after Vision.

My heart was not having a good time during this because of how incredibly tense I felt. I was attacked a couple of times as well which left me with cuts and bruises around my arms. The adrenaline rush really kept me distracted from the pain and gave me enough boost to keep going (And no I am not a masochist /hj)

And although I was well equipped and trained to fight, I was still afraid. I’d managed to fend one of them off for a bit when they had tried to take Vision away, which bought enough time for Pietro and Wanda to come. The entire thing was a MESS but we did receive some extra help (Aka Steve, Nat, and Sam coming to the rescue and escorting us to the Avengers Facility for the time being)

All in all, we’d thought it would go well. I had high hopes with the plan to take Vision to Wakanda so he could get the stone safely removed. But god the awful mess we were all plunged into completely KILLED every hope I had left. Wanda guarded Vision during the procedure which left me and Pietro on the battlefield. I will NEVER forget the feeling of anticipating the creatures as they start breaking through the barrier. But I knew everyone was ready, we were already in formation and I was tasked near Natasha. (A lot of this had been pre-planned before, such as battle formations, possible solutions if things go south, and the goal in mind)

When we were called out to attack, the atmosphere of the air was completely different. I could feel everyone’s fear but also burning force to charge into battle. (Everyone’s emotions were on a high which was INSANEE because this charged up my own emotions as well) I just charging straight ahead. I had only two thoughts in mind; try to stay alive and eradicate those creatures (whatever the fuck you call them :sob: ) I had a suit and a long sword equipped on me which were both gifted to me by Shuri + followed a similar style and concept to T’Challa’s suit. (Absorbs energy) So yes, I wasn’t completely out there unprepared.

The battle itself was anxiety-inducing. Left and right bro they were just coming in with the fucking desire to kill. These creatures were easy to eradicate because their blind spots weren’t hard to spot, they lacked the intellectuality to actually be a threat but what was so damn dangerous about them was the fact that there were SO MANY of them. I had to slice them off left and right and it didn’t stop there, I couldn’t take a breather for one second because there was no time to even stop. They just kept coming.

Also, the thing about battlefields for me is that I’ve needed to learn how to zone out external noises to concentrate sometimes. Because of everything happening around me, it can be hard to concentrate from hearing all the shrieks or weapons clashing about. It does overwhelm my senses at times because of the amount of chaos happening all at once. But over time I managed to tackle that problem, I was able to concentrate better.

Another thing was that I always knew Thor was in battle when I could feel the vibrations from his thunders. Because it does sort of reverberate? This goes the same for Wanda as well—though hers is more of a deep rumble if that makes sense.

This part is going to be harder for me to tell, but I’ll try my best. When more of Thanos’s alliance arrived, I had completely lost track of where Pietro was. He had been darting around the battlefield, trying to clear as much as possible and getting to help when needed but he completely disappeared which made me feel extremely uneasy.

If I correctly, this was around the same time Wanda came to the battlefield when the giant wheel/threshers appeared. After the entire shit that occurred, I looked everywhere for Pietro and found him at the side with a wound to his chest. When I saw the condition he was in, I immediately started to break down while still trying to hold on to that one hope that he could come out of this alive. But he refused to move or let me help him and said his final wishes and words.

I can not describe the amount of pain that weighed on my shoulders (the fact that he had continued to smile through it and never stopped trying to crack jokes when it’s clearly not the time for it). I tried to stop him from thinking about death but he said he’d already accepted it. I couldn’t have a moment of grief either because one of the of the black order attacked me. Knowing that it was she who was responsible had me making horrible decisions.

Because being overcome by so many things at once; the battlefield, the losses, Vision, Wanda, saving the world, and losing Pietro made me almost blinded by revenge and anger. I was not thinking straight at that time, attacked without formulating a plan, and due to the action of my consequences, I sustained a pretty serious injury on the side of my stomach. Natasha came and assisted me before Wanda managed to the take the bitch out and channeled her anger while she was at it. I’ve never felt her so angry and despondent, it was like a wave of emotion just hits us.

The whole time I wanted to crumble, but I knew I couldn’t even spare a single fucking second to really take a MOMENT to process whatever the hell just happened. Because it just continued on and on. I couldn’t much after this because I tried to forget about this entire battle, but I really couldn’t. It was a bit of a blur but I did fighting Thanos while Wanda was trying to destroy the mind stone on Vision. I was starting to feel my energy deteriorate too—and it was getting harder for me to ignore my body’s exhaustion. (Also, worth a mention but Thanos is so fucking huge. No joke, he was actually towering over us. Like I knew he was huge but not this HUGE)

This part was once again a blur. I was exhausted even though I wasn’t losing blood anymore because Wanda healed my wounds. All I could recall was Vision surrendering and Wanda between Vision and Thanos. And then afterward, I went blank? (Idk I either ed out or couldn’t this particular part) But I did seeing Vision and the way Thanos yanked the stone out of him. I couldn’t even cry at that point. I went in total shock and at an utter loss for words basically. More shit happened and before I know it, I realized I was getting blipped. I held to Wanda for one last time and at that moment, I just wanted to be in her arms forever but I knew I’d disappear to god knows where and I didn’t have time. So I made sure to relay some final wishes and that was it. I entered an absolute fucking nothingness. Absolutely NOTHING. And it didn’t feel like peace, it felt like defeat.

This will conclude the first part of my experience. I have a lot more to cover, I’m honestly just in a very overwhelmed state at the moment. I it, I did actually cry while writing this but I am feeling better right now. :) I will be writing more as the time goes. I’m still taking some time to write my experiences in my personal docs—but I will be sure to cover as much as I can. I apologize for the short outro because it’s 3am now and my eyes are fighting the urge to sleep. Thank you so much for reading! <33 As always happy shifting/respawning. I love you all. :two_hearts: